I'm No Spy
by Charlie Shephard
Summary: Oneshot that takes place between vs The Nemesis and vs The Crown Vic. Deals with whether Sarah is going to leave with Bryce or stay with Chuck.


**A/N: Hello again. I was watching Scrubs when I had the idea that Superman by Lazlo Bane not only applies to Scrubs, but it fits pretty well with Chuck as well. And so...heres the result of it. I don't own Lazlo Bane or Chuck, and it's not betaed so all mistakes are mine. Hope you like it. It fits directly between _Nemesis_ and _Crown Vic_, so you all know the eventual outcome :D. **

**I'm No Spy**

_Out the door just in time_

_Head down the 405_

_Gotta meet the new boss by 8 a.m_

_The phone rings in the car_

_The wife is workin' hard_

_She's running late tonight again_

If someone had asked Chuck what he'd be doing tonight, he never would have imagined he'd be in this horrible predicament. He remembered the night before vividly, as it had only been 24 hours ago he'd asked Sarah out on a real date. He remembered the call word for word.

"Hi, it's Chuck." He'd greeted lamely. "Of course it's me. It's me, it's Chuck." He'd continued babbling, before urging himself to get to the point. "Look, I was just wondering if you wanna go out on a date tonight…and by date I mean no GPS and no mikes, and no chaperones. It would just be us." _Us. _What an amazing concept. Chuck and Sarah. It was something he could definitely get used to. The question still remained though- could she? As the day had worn on, he was beginning to discover the answer. "Thinking maybe we could hit up Sbarro. They just named a new pizza after Morgan and I kinda wanted to support him. So, you know, ok. Bye." He finished, hanging up the phone with a smile on his face, expecting at least a call back in the very near future.

How wrong he was. Here he was, sitting in the exact same spot, still waiting on that phone call.

_Well_

_I know what I've been told_

_You got to work to feed the soul_

_But I can't do this all on my own_

_No, I know, I'm no Superman_

_I'm no Superman_

Chuck sat in the living room of Casa Bartowski enjoying the company of his only true family; unsure whether this could actually be classified as "enjoying". Ellie and Captain Awesome were digging in to Thanksgiving leftovers while Morgan wolfed down a handcrafted cold turkey sandwich. Chuck on the other hand, had a lot more on his mind than the holidays and the company of his loved ones; mainly because one in particular was missing.

"Mmmhmm… man. This is great." Morgan moaned, oblivious to Chuck's discomfort. "Right? Two buddies, a couple of cold turkey sandwiches and all the mayo you could want. " He continued until finally realizing Chuck wasn't really paying attention. "You alright, Chuck?"

Chuck lifted his gaze from the floor and returned his friend's stare. _Not really_, he wanted to say. _I'm pretty sure my fake but not-so-fake girlfriend, the woman who I am totally and completely in love with, is about to walk out of my life forever. With Bryce Larkin off all people. It kinda sucks._

Chuck gestured to Morgan to wait a second as he pulled his iPhone out of his pocket and debated dialing Sarah's number. _It wasn't all fake, right? I mean she kissed me at the docks. Man, what a kiss that was. It must have had something to do with me, right? Or were mine the only lips available?_

Without giving himself a chance to second-guess himself he pressed send. _Well, here goes nothing. I'm going to find out now one way or the other, _he thought as he heard the first ring. Patiently he waited as the phone rang twice, three times, four times…before finally he reached Sarah's voicemail. "This is Sarah. Leave a message." Chuck heard the message recite, quickly and concisely, as he got up from the couch and moved towards his bedroom.

_There you go. Happy you called now, Chuck? She's gone. She's not picking up her phone; she doesn't want to talk to you. For the second time in your life, you've been bested by Bryce Fucking Larkin. You may know that _no one _is ever going to love her as much as you do, but what's that worth if she doesn't know it? _

Chuck inner turmoil was interrupted by the sound of the beep. Surprised, Chuck debated whether or not he should just hang up the phone anyway. _Why not? It's not like she's listening anyway. _Before he knew it though, he'd begun speaking to the desolate machine on the other end. "Hey Sarah. It's me—it's Chuck again. I was just calling because you never got back to me about that date. Wow, I sound like such a loser right now." Chuck scolded himself aloud before continuing, "Well, anyway, you're probably on your way to Indonesia or somewhere awesome, and I get that—I mean I wouldn't want to babysit me if I was a badass super spy like you. So, yea, I'm gonna go." Chuck failed to muster the courage to say what he really wanted to say. Instead he simply muttered, "Bye, Sarah."

_You've got your love online_

_You think you're doing fine_

_But you're just plugged into the wall_

"Chuck?" Ellie said as he re-entered the living room, eyes fixed to the floor.

"You alright, buddy?" Morgan continued as Chuck walked past Ellie on the way to the front door. He was in no mood for talking right now; he desperately needed some time alone.

"Yea, I'm fine guys, really. I'm just gonna take a walk. I'll be back in a little bit. Just need to clear my head, work out some things.

"That is not awesome." The Captain's booming voice could be heard from the courtyard as the door closed shut. He needed to think, he needed to move on just as he'd done twenty years earlier when his father had left him.

He knew just the place.

_And that deck of tarot cards_

_Won't get you very far_

_There ain't no hand to break your fall_

Sarah strode into the Castle just past 10pm to collect her last few possessions. In all honesty, she still hadn't decided whether to leave with Bryce, but with her deadline fast approaching, she wanted to make sure she was ready to leave if it came to that.

As the freezer door hissed open and she descended the stairs of Castle at a brisk pace, he eyes fell upon the one man she really didn't want to see. To make matters worse, he seemed in an extremely bad mood. A mood so bad that cleaning his precious Sig Sauer did nothing to wipe the permanent frown off of his face.

"Walker." Casey greeted, as stoic and uncaring as always.

"Casey." She returned, trying not to let any emotion creep into her words.

"What the hell are you doing down here? I figured you'd be halfway to Bryce by now." Casey remarked smugly, not once allowing his glance to leave the barrel of the weapon he was polishing.

"I could ask you the same thing." Sarah replied, eager to move the conversation away from her.

"Sorry, Walker, but Larkin's not my type. He's all yours." Casey grunted as he dropped the pistol and picked the next in line.

"Funny, Casey, but not what I asked. What are you doing down here?" She repeated herself sternly; so far her tactic was working.

"The geeks in a weird mood. When he gets sulky I get nauseous." Casey replied honestly.

"Nerd." Sarah corrected him quickly. It did strike her that even though she could walk out that door one last time at any second, Chuck Bartowski would not be called a geek on her watch- not unless that someone had a death wish. "He's not a geek."

"Whatever, Walker. So what's your excuse? You've done a pretty good job skirting that particular issue." Casey said.

Instantly Sarah's head shot up. She picked up on Casey's victorious grin almost immediately. _How could she have been so stupid? Casey's an NSA agent; of course he'd pick up on my deflections._

"I uhh, had to pick up a few things." Sarah explained quickly, knowing it was nowhere enough to get Casey off her back.

Casey chuckled. "Right. Whatever you say, Walker." He said, before going right back to polishing the triggers of his trusty friends.

_Well_

_I know what I've been told_

_You gotta know just when to fold_

_But I can't do this all on my own_

_No, I know, I'm no Superman_

_I'm no Superman_

"You're really going to make me ask, aren't you?" Sarah said, clearly annoyed at Casey's antics.

"Ask what?" Casey feigned innocence; he was obviously enjoying this, though his face betrayed nothing.

"Chuck. Why is he upset?"

"Do you seriously think Bartowski's an idiot? Or have you failed to remember that it wasn't just you and Larkin in the Buy More tonight when he told you that you'd always have Omaha? Did you honestly think he wouldn't figure it out?" Casey said strongly, "I thought you were different Walker. I thought you actually cared about the kid. Apparently I was wrong."

Sarah didn't respond. She had no idea how to respond to an attack like that. The worst part was that Casey was entirely right. She did care about Chuck, more than she should to be totally honest, but a deep-cover assignment with Bryce got her blood pumping. It was everything she'd been trained for, everything she was programmed to revel in. Could _feelings _ever overcome that?

"What the hell would you do, Casey? What would you do?" She seethingly accused in reply. If she riled Casey up enough, he'd forget about their original conversation.

But to her surprise and annoyance, Casey remained as calm as ever. "It's not about me, now is it Walker?"

_You've crossed the finish line_

_Won the race but lost your mind_

_Was it worth it after all?_

Sarah ran her hand through her hair before heading back towards the Castle stairs empty handed. It didn't really matter that she hadn't picked up her "possessions", as they were never important anyway, just things that would remind her of whichever option she didn't choose.

As she neared the exit of Castle for what could be the last time, Casey shouted up to her. "Sarah, wait." Sarah froze in place; he'd never called her Sarah before. Not once.

"No matter which choice you make Sarah, I'll survive. But the kid, he cares about you. If you do decide to leave, at least have the decency to say goodbye. You owe him that much." Casey said, before Sarah walked out of the Orange Orange into the brisk California night.

She drove under the speed limit the entire way to Casa Bartowski, partly because she didn't trust herself at a higher speed in her current distress, but partly because she didn't know what she'd say to Chuck. She didn't even know if she wanted to leave anymore. She had Casey to thank for that.

She pulled in to the parking lot in Echo Park to see the Nerd Herder safely parked in it's usual spot about three spaces away from the one she currently occupied. Sarah slowly made her way into the courtyard and towards the Morgan door, eager to talk to Chuck. Hopefully their conversation would sway her decision one-way or the other. Her time was up in an hour after all.

She had one leg in the window when she could hear Morgan's obnoxious voice and two pairs of footsteps from just outside the door. Not wanting to interrupt whatever they were doing, Sarah frantically withdrew from the windowsill and backed against the wall. It couldn't hurt to listen, could it?

"Well, how about some Call of Duty, Chuck? We haven't played that in ages. You're always busy with Sarah, man, we never spend any time together." Morgan spoke one hundred miles a minute, "C'mon, you just sit down on the bed and I'll set it up. Take your mind off whatever the hell is up with you."

"Alright, Morgan." Chuck answered less than enthusiastically.

Sarah had seen Chuck play Call of Duty before, and within two minutes she could tell that he wasn't up to his usual standard. Something was definitely bothering him, and she'd grown pretty sure it had something to do with her. There was no denying it, and that fact alone stung.

Chuck had died five times in ninety seconds, killing no enemies in the process. There was definitely something going on. It wasn't long before Morgan noticed as well. Standing up, he walked over to the Xbox 360 and shut it off. "Ok, dude. You're playing like me. What the hell is up with you?"

"Sarah's leaving." Chuck replied simply after a moment, causing Sarah to gasp involuntarily. Fortunately though, she was able to cover up the sound well enough that neither Chuck nor Morgan heard anything.

"What?" Morgan replied in disbelief.

Now more than ever Sarah wished she'd picked up Chuck's phone call from what seemed like years ago, but in reality was only hours. Instead though, she'd done what she does best. Construct those immovable walls around her heart and refuse to let anything have even the slightest chance at bursting through. As a result, the phone sat silently on her bedside table, attempting to cage her off from the rest of the world.

But once again, Chuck had found a way through.

_I need you here with me_

_Cause love is all we need_

_Just take a hold of the hand that breaks the fall_

It had taken Chuck about an hour to clear his thoughts at the beach. Well, it had taken him an hour to do something that even resembled clearing his thoughts. In hindsight, it wasn't the wisest place to go to get his mind off of Sarah. It was the place he'd truly met Sarah Walker. Sarah Walker the person, not Sarah Walker the agent.

They'd finished the best date of his life to that point, and even though he'd just found that it was all a cover for her, it didn't bother him as much as it should have. He was still riding the high that a girl like her would ever think about going out with a nerd like him.

"_I need you to trust me, Chuck."_, She'd said- and from that day on she had him. From the moment she'd whispered those words to him and playfully bumped his shoulder, he'd trusted her. _Lot of good it's done me._

He trusted her implicitly from that moment onward, whether it be with his life or with his heart, and now he got to see how it all paid off.

It didn't.

Chuck pulled the Nerd Herder into the parking lot outside Ellie and Devon's apartment and headed inside only to be bombarded by questions from Morgan and the Awesome's. He wasn't in the mood to talk about Sarah, or the CIA, or anything for that matter and so didn't respond when Morgan persistently attempted to get him to open up to him.

"Well, how about some Call of Duty, Chuck? We haven't played that in ages. You're always busy with Sarah, man, we never spend any time together." Morgan spoke one hundred miles a minute, "C'mon, you just sit down on the bed and I'll set it up. Take your mind off whatever the hell is up with you."

"Alright, Morgan." Chuck answered less than enthusiastically. Though he wasn't in the mood to fake being a Navy Seal, he would anyway- even if it was only to appease his friend. While this was motive enough to turn on the game itself, it wasn't near enough to actually be competitive with the other players online.

After watching Chuck kill no one and die five times in just over a minute, Morgan had had enough. Standing up, he walked over to the Xbox 360 and shut it off. "Ok, dude. You're playing like me. What the hell is up with you?"

"Sarah's leaving." Chuck replied simply.

"What?" Morgan replied in disbelief.

"Sarah's leaving. She…she got a new job offer. It's in… well, it's not here." Chuck continued, not really bothered any more about the cover. What did it matter anymore anyway; he knew he'd last a few days at most without Sarah. "And it doesn't include me."

"Wow, dude. I am so sorry." Morgan whispered, the shock had yet to dissipate.

"Yea. But she deserves it. She's the best…yogurt salesman… I've ever met. She got partnered with one of my old friends from college, and they're going to be working together at corporate. Saving the world, one spoon at a time." Chuck laughed to himself at his horribly sad attempt at humor.

_Well I know what I've been told_

_Gotta break free to break the mold_

_But I can't do this all on my own_

_No I can't do this all on my own_

_I know that I'm no Superman_

_I'm no Superman_

_I'm no Superman_

"I'm really sorry about that Chuck. But I'm here for you right? We'll get through this. I promise you." Morgan insisted, trying to lift Chuck's spirits.

"I don't know buddy. It's going to take me a while. I mean, she was my rock, my anchor, my best friend—" Chuck began.

"Whoa, Chuck. Let's not get crazy here. I thought I was your best friend?" Morgan tried to joke, but Chuck failed to see the humor.

"You'll always be my best friend Morgan, but Sarah…she was something else. She was always there for me, always had my back, I could always count on her to come through for me. To tell you the truth, I don't think I'd be sitting here if it weren't for her. She saved me."

Morgan remained silent, knowing that Chuck needed this opportunity to vent. "You know what the worst part is, buddy?" Chuck asked, "That I am completely and totally in love with her."

"Dude, you sound like you need a grape soda. I'll be right back." Morgan said, before rushing out toward the kitchen.

Chuck leaned back and allowed himself to crash down on his bed, staring at the plain white ceiling of his bedroom. "I'm not a spy. Never was, never will be. I'm just a normal guy working at a Buy More." He whispered to himself, "But you, Sarah Walker, will never be normal. You will always be so much more."

"I just don't think I can do this alone."

If Chuck had looked out his window to the courtyard at that instant, he would have seen the blonde tresses, puffy red eyes and tear-stained cheeks of one Agent Sarah Walker leaving the courtyard.

It wasn't the first time she'd left this place in tears, and it would most certainly not be the last.

_Someday we'll be together_

_I'm no Superman_

_Someday_

_Someday we'll be together_

_Someday_

_I'm no Superman_

**A/N: Hope you liked it. If you did, please review. If you didn't...review anyway :D. I think I stuck to the characters at this point in the Chuckverse pretty well, but feel free to let me know any problems you have. I wanted to make it lighter than my other Chuck oneshot (vs His Beautiful Rescue), but it's not much better, as it's mainly angst. I promise by AU fic will be better on the Charah. **

**Hopefully the next few episodes of Chuck give us our weekly dose of Charah as well.**


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